Key Takeaways:
- Loneliness as a Public Health Crisis
Loneliness is a growing epidemic with serious mental and physical health implications, including increased risks of cardiovascular disease, dementia, and premature death. Addressing loneliness is crucial as the global population ages. - Loneliness vs. Being Alone
Being alone is a physical state, while loneliness is an emotional experience of disconnection. One can feel lonely even when surrounded by others or fulfilled while alone, depending on internal and external factors. - Social Media’s Role
Contrary to expectations, increased social media use often exacerbates feelings of disconnection rather than fostering genuine connections. It can contribute to social comparison, reducing self-esteem and meaningful interactions. - Loneliness Across Age Groups
Surprisingly, younger adults (19–29 years) report higher loneliness rates than older adults, challenging the stereotype that loneliness primarily affects the elderly. - Positive Potential of Loneliness
While painful, loneliness can serve as a motivator to seek new connections or improve existing relationships, driving personal and social growth. - Combating Loneliness
Building meaningful in-person relationships, participating in community activities, and practicing self-care can significantly reduce loneliness. Simple acts of connection, like volunteering or joining groups, foster belonging.
In today’s modern life and hyper-connected world, why are so many people feeling lonely and isolated? Despite all the technological advancements that were meant to bring us closer together, studies show that loneliness is now at an all-time high. Many think that the pandemic pushed us over the cliff of loneliness. While the pandemic is a factor, research shows that loneliness had been increasing with the decrease in social connections over the past several decades.
Loneliness is not just a fleeting sadness but a serious health concern that can have long-lasting impacts on our physical and mental health. With the rise of social media and the decline of face-to-face interactions, many individuals struggle to find genuine connections and a sense of belonging.
We need to prioritize human connection and relationships to combat the loneliness epidemic. Studies have shown that strong social ties can significantly impact our overall health and well-being. This article will explore the effects of loneliness on our health and provide tips on connecting with others in meaningful ways.
Why are we so lonely?
Loneliness is a growing epidemic in today’s society, with a staggering 34% of Americans age 50 – 80 reporting frequent feelings of loneliness and isolation. These numbers are down from a high of 54% at the height of the pandemic. Research has shown that loneliness can have detrimental effects on both physical and mental health, particularly in older adults.
A recent study by scientists at Duke-NUS Medical School (Singapore) and Nihon University (Tokyo, Japan) found that lonely older adults have a shorter life expectancy and forfeit years of good health than their peers who do not feel lonely.
“We found that lonely older adults can expect to live a shorter life than their peers who don’t perceive themselves as lonely,” summarised the study’s lead author, Assistant Professor Rahul Malhotra, Head of Research at Duke-NUS’ Centre for Ageing Research and Education (CARE).
“Furthermore, they pay a penalty for their shorter life by forfeiting potential years of good health.”
This highlights the importance of addressing loneliness as a public health concern, especially as the global population ages.
Epidemic of Loneliness
It is essential to distinguish between being alone and feeling lonely. While solitude can be nourishing and even enjoyable for some individuals, loneliness is a deeper feeling of an inability to find meaning for one’s life and is experienced as an unpleasant and negative emotion.
The issue of loneliness has been a growing concern for quite some time now. However, it gained significant attention when U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy released a report highlighting the “epidemic of loneliness and isolation.”
This emotion can be described as a feeling within our body that something isn’t right and our survival is threatened. As it turns out, loneliness does threaten both our mental and physical health. Its effects include various health risks such as cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety, and even premature death.
From an evolutionary perspective, it makes sense that being alone would impact a person’s survival ability. We evolved a survival mechanism, the emotion of loneliness, to drive us to connect with others.
Loneliness and Covid-19 Epidemic
Loneliness is a common and often overlooked issue that affects many people, and the COVID-19 pandemic has only exacerbated this problem. However, it’s important to recognize that loneliness was already a significant issue prior to the pandemic.
Even before COVID-19 hit, studies showed that loneliness was on the rise, with a significant portion of the population reporting feelings of isolation and disconnection from others. Factors such as increased screen time, social media usage, and a lack of meaningful social interactions contributed to this trend.
The pandemic only increased feelings of loneliness; quarantine measures and social distancing guidelines forced people to isolate themselves even further. With limited in-person socialization opportunities, many individuals felt even more lonely and disconnected from others.
But it’s important to remember that loneliness is not just a result of external circumstances like a global pandemic. It can also be caused by internal factors such as low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, or past traumas. These underlying issues can make it difficult for individuals to form and maintain meaningful connections with others, leading to loneliness and isolation.
How is loneliness related to health?
As an ER physician, I know many patients have a profound sense of loneliness/isolation. When I sit down and talk with these patients, I often hear a comment from my elderly patients:
I have no one to talk to. I guess younger people aren’t lonely because they always have someone to talk to on their phones or computers. I wouldn’t be so lonely if I could use a computer better.
I believe this may be a myth. Research studies have shown the opposite that more time spent on social media doesn’t help one not feel lonely. In fact it is more likely the opposite is occurring and social media is creating disconnection rather than connection.
Loneliness and its Effects on Physical Health
Loneliness is a subjective feeling of isolation and lack of connection with others. It can have serious physical health effects, as studies have shown that chronic loneliness can lead to increased risks of heart disease, high blood pressure, weakened immune system, and even early mortality.
When someone feels lonely and disconnected, their body can release stress hormones like cortisol, which can weaken the immune system and increase inflammation in the body. This can lead to a range of health issues such as digestive problems, insomnia, and a higher susceptibility to infections.
Loneliness can also impact behaviors that furthur adversely influence their physical health, such as decreased physical activity, poor diet choices, and increased alcohol or drug use. The lack of social support and connection can also contribute to increased levels of anxiety and depression, which can also negatively impact physical health.
Loneliness and Mental Health
As mentioned, loneliness is feeling disconnected or isolated from others, even when surrounded by people. It can have a significant impact on mental health, leading to feelings of sadness, anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Chronic loneliness has been linked to a variety of mental health issues, including increased stress, sleep disturbances, and a weakened immune system.
Loneliness can also contribute to negative coping behaviors such as substance abuse or overeating. Addressing loneliness and seeking support from friends, family, or mental health professionals is essential to improve overall mental well-being. Engaging in social activities, cultivating meaningful relationships, and practicing self-care can help combat feelings of loneliness and improve mental health.
Who suffers from loneliness? The 3 Myths
Myth number 1: Older people are the ones who suffer from loneliness the most
You may believe that older people are the ones who suffer from loneliness the most? Think again. Contrary to popular belief, a recent survey conducted by Meta-Gullup in 142 countries has shown that loneliness rates are highest among younger adults aged 19 to 29, at 27%, compared to adults aged 65 and older, at only 17%. This dispels the myth that older people are the ones who struggle the most with loneliness. There are a number of theories as to why this might be, but the theory that makes a lot of sense to me is the one that proposes that the large amount of time spent on social media is a contributing factor. Social media can create feelings of disconnection as a result of contemporary culture pressures, and social comparison. Unrelated to social media use is an additional factor of transistions between life stages. This is according to a study done by the NIH National Institute of Health.
Loneliness can affect anyone, regardless of age. It’s important to recognize and address feelings of loneliness before they escalate.
Myth number 2: Being alone and feeling lonely are the same thing
Do you believe that being alone and feeling lonely are the same thing?
Being alone and lonely isn’t the same thing. Alone is a state of being, and lonely is a state of mind. Loneliness doesn’t come from being alone.
You can feel lonely when you’re alone, but you can also feel lonely around others. Loneliness occurs when we believe we need others to help us feel connected. It is a feeling of disconnection. You can feel connected, happy, and even relieved to spend time alone if you look within to feel connected.
One (being alone) describes the physical, and the other (loneliness) describes the emotional. Loneliness doesn’t come from being alone. You can feel lonely when you’re alone, but you can also feel lonely around others. You may feel lonely when you’re alone, but you can also feel exhilarated and free. It has a lot to do with whether solitude is wanted or not.
What do you do with your alone time when you find yourself alone? Do you take long walks, read, reflect, or start talking to yourself? I’ve sat down with patients who have lived alone for a long time, a decade, even without family or roommates. They are happy, friendly, satisfied, and productive in life. They tell me solitude is lovely, and when they don’t want the solitude they have plenty of people in their life they can talk to and spend time with. They tell me, “being alone gives me space to reflect, dream, and create. It is sometimes uncomfortable, but it is nourishing.”
Loneliness, on the other hand, is a hollow hunger. It sustains itself on disappointment, and disconnection, feeds itself with fear and doubt. Loneliness wants. It needs. It takes. Imagine a jack-0-lantern. The solitary person is lit from within, self-sustaining, radiating warmth. The lonely person lacks the flame within and is left with an empty, dark, scooped-out feeling.
The lonely person grins outwardly because that is the face the world expects — except it isn’t a smile but more of a grimace that can hardly be seen, let alone believed because something (the inner flame) is missing inside. If left in this state long enough, we collapse like the scooped our jack-O-lantern without a flame.
I would argue that social media is somewhat to blame. Intimate, honest, substantive connections to others cure loneliness. Not the virtual kind but the personal, in-person kind. We seem to be hiding in virtual worlds all the time and are not practicing the skills it takes to be truly connected to actual human beings. The skills or looking someone in the eye, using our mirror neurons to express empathy, and feel all the emotions of an in-person relationship.
Myth number 3: Loneliness is bad
Loneliness is not always bad. Loneliness hurts, but it can be a force for good. A force that drives us to look for new friends or find ways to improve our existing relationships. Are you Lonely? If so, what can you do about it? Realize you aren’t alone, and 88 million other Americans are also struggling with loneliness.
Ways to combat loneliness and build connections
You might want to get involved in the community. Church or secular, there are people all around you who need someone who’s been around the block a few times. Big Brothers/Sisters, community service organizations, whatever. Get out of your headspace and share your time and wisdom with the people around you. I recently spoke with an individual who put together a group of people in his retirement community that responds to their neighbors when someone needs help. The group meets only twice a year and he tells me it doesn’t take much of the members time as they have many volunteers. It makes a big difference to this retirement community as many of the seniors live alone and having someone they can call on to help them is huge.
If I find myself alone, I’d rather take the remainder of the time that I have left and be able to spend whatever time I need with my kids and extended family, as much time as I can, making the world a better place.
Check out more of my Health and Longevity articles (The Power of Movement for Your Health and Longevity or The Power of Gratitude: Benefits and Inspiration and 7 Ways Mindfulness Creates Long-Term Wealth).
FAQ:
Q. What’s the difference between being alone and loneliness?
A. Being alone refers to the physical state of not being with others, while loneliness is an emotional feeling of disconnection, which can occur even in a crowd.
Q. Who is most affected by loneliness?
A. Research shows younger adults (19–29 years) experience higher loneliness rates than older adults, often due to social media pressures and life stage transitions.
Q. How does loneliness impact health?
A. Loneliness triggers stress hormones, increasing risks for heart disease, weakened immunity, depression, anxiety, and even early mortality.
Q. Is loneliness always bad?
A. Not necessarily. Loneliness can inspire positive change by motivating individuals to seek or deepen meaningful connections and improve relationships.
Q. How has social media influenced loneliness?
A. Social media often increases feelings of isolation by replacing in-person interactions with superficial online connections and fostering harmful comparisons.
Q. What can I do to combat loneliness?
A. Engage in community activities, volunteer, nurture face-to-face relationships, and take care of your mental health through mindfulness and self-care practices.
